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Comparison is the thief of Joy

Sep 21 '12
redhotandtucker: Best Johnny Depp impersonation ever? 51-year-old Alison Whelan of Devon, England was in court this week for an incident that happened last September.  Alison was on a two-day drinking bender, AND high on hallucinogenic drugs.  And she and a friend were looking for a place to crash. They stumbled down toward a river and Alison decided to STEAL A BOAT.  As she tried to unhook it from the dock, the cops arrived.  Which is when Alison uncorked one of the best real-life criminal catchphrases possible. She yelled at the cops, quote, “I’M JACK SPARROW!”  Then she tried to drive off in the boat. Anyway, Alison only floated a short distance before the police stopped the boat.  And this week she was sentenced to four months in prison for aggravated vehicle theft. 

redhotandtucker:

Best Johnny Depp impersonation ever?

51-year-old Alison Whelan of Devon, England was in court this week for an incident that happened last September.  Alison was on a two-day drinking bender, AND high on hallucinogenic drugs.  And she and a friend were looking for a place to crash.

They stumbled down toward a river and Alison decided to STEAL A BOAT.  As she tried to unhook it from the dock, the cops arrived.  Which is when Alison uncorked one of the best real-life criminal catchphrases possible.

She yelled at the cops, quote, “I’M JACK SPARROW!”  Then she tried to drive off in the boat.

Anyway, Alison only floated a short distance before the police stopped the boat.  And this week she was sentenced to four months in prison for aggravated vehicle theft. 

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